The Hedge Maze

[The Evil Overlordess]

((Can we try to make this something beyond one-liners, please? PLEAE? Let's try.))

The Bubblewrapian Meadows tend to become deserted when the winds begin to blow cold and the flowers shed their petals. The bubblewrap of the summer withers, no longer pop-able, and the solitary garlic tree is overrun by hoards of ravenous flesh-eating squirrels who chitter angrily at anyone who dares approach. Gone are the happy picnickers, the people playing in the pond, or pushing minor '80s celebrities into the cattails.

Thus it was quite unusual to see a smallish figure happily bobbing about over the dry ground.

Let the camera of the narrative zoom in slightly, and one could make out wind-swept brown hair, black-framed glasses, a plaid scarf and a peacoat covered in rattling pins and buttons. This was the Evil Overlordess of the Bubblewrapian Empire, and she was out for a wander over the fields.

"Hmm," she mused, the noise nearly lost in the wind as she stood on a grassy hill, staring down at the meadows. "I swear this place grows. Been walking ages and..."

A dark shape on the next hilltop caught her eye, and she blinked. With a shriek of joy and a scramble, she was off to go peer at it.

Things growing in the BWE was not all that unusual, but this was special. Oh, she had wanted one for years!

It was a hedge maze. The yew branches still bore their dark needles though everything else was cold, and the stone-laid path was slick with frost.

"Oh, rapture," she gleebled quietly. "We are so exploring ALL of this, if it takes us until next Saint Grimoria day!"

[David the Knight of Night]

David popped out of the secret (not so much anymore) passage between realities in the cattails and walked over to TEO.
"Wow! Did this just pop out of no-where?" David said, already knowing the answer. Everything pops up out of nowhere on the BWE. But, just in case some random person had taken the time to make it, he just wanted to know.
"Should go together or seperately?"

[The Evil Overlordess]

TEO blinked calmly and then screamed as David popped out of blue freaking nowhere.

"I think so!" she answered once she had calmed down and stopped choking and rolling on the ground. Her eyes narrowed. "Unless some crafty bastards 'ave been experimenting with this... landscaping... lark behind my back."

She frowned, tugged at her scarf, and peered into the maze. Immediately it branched into two separate ways.

"Werr... maybe we should go together, seeing as things like these traditionally have monsters and the like. What say you?"

She hefted her Skillet, which had also appeared out of nowhere.

[David the Knight of Night]

"Yes. We shall!" David said bravely as he took out his guitar and his sword. He pointed onward, into the maze and started to walk in.
As David walked through the maze, he was looking around at the beautiful plants that made up the maze when he suddenly realized...
"Hey! I think . . ." And as David was about to reveal what he thought, the plants swallowed him up in a green and flowery smelling wall.

[Robyn]

As David was being swallowed into one wall, Robin was appearing out of another.

Hey TEO! *waves* What is this place? Well, whatever it is, we're prolly gonna need David too.

*goes over to the wall that swallowed David* *prods it* Hey in there! Let David out! *poke poke*

[The Evil Overlordess]

"Er. Hi, Robin."

TEO blinked. She had just walked out of a wall, but it didn't seem to bother Robin, so should could deal with it.

She guessed.

"Er. If it's just a hedge maze, we should be able to either hack through or go over the top to find him. I mean-- plants don't REALLY eat people, right? ...right?"

TEO gibbered and cautiously pulled out the Spoon of Fire. She held the flaming spoon to the wall, but it merely flickered harmlessly.

"Huh. Maybe--" She took out a possum sword and tried to stab it into the yew branches, but it did no damage. "Weird. This place is kinda givin' me the creeps. You too?"

[Robyn]

Hmm....somewhat. Perhaps we could jump across the tops of the hedge? Its worth a shot. *pulls out four giant springs* Here, you put them on your feet like this, *demonstrates* and then you can jump much higher.

*leaps up onto the hedge wall* Well, it seems stable. Wait a minute, TEO, I think I can see David INSIDE the hedge. Surrounded by this purple stuff. What on earth?

[The Evil Overlordess]

"Cool!" TEO beamed at this, and then paused. "No, wait. Not cool. Very, very freaky, h'in fact."

She knocked politely on the hedge maze. "Er, David? You in there? Are you alive? Jeez, you have all the luck... five minutes into the RP, and you're already in a life-or-death situation." She took a small notebook from the pocket of her black coat and uncapped a pen. "Tell me-- how does that make you feel?"

[David the Knight of Night]

David, who had already been psychoanalyzed three times this week, mumbled and cursed in return. Of course, the cursing was because he had just realized he was being digested. He didn't like to be in life or deth situations, but he suddenly realized that whenever the thread was getting boring (or he couldn't think of anything brilliant to write), he always got eaten. Or he would kill something.

So, David, after realizing he didn't want to die in the belly of a shrubbery, decided to do something about it. He grabbed his guitar and his sword and started trying to bash his way out.

[Robyn]

*looks down at David through the hedge* Umm, David? I think you're making it worse. *watches as the purple stuff grows larger* Yep. Deffinetely worse.

Then I guess there's only one thing to do! *shrieks DAVID NEEDS SAVING! *dives into the hedge*

[The Evil Overlordess]

"Sodding hell. That means I have to do something heroic or I'll look like a wimp. Poop."

TEO sighed and fidgeted for a moment and then hefted her skillet, weighing the choices.

"Weeell, David is my minion, and I quite like Robin, but let's face it—she obeys Skiv. So that means I should… er… oh, damnit."

She jumped into the hedge after Robin, neatly leaving an explanation of the hedge up to David. Heheh.

[David the Knight of Night]

David sighed, wondering what she wanted him to describe. Seriously, it's just a shrubbery/hedge that eats people and submerges them in purple goo. What else can you say?

Whatever.

David heard the random yelling and spouting about heroics and he knew things were going to go down hill.

Next thing he knew, Robin fell on top of David's chest as she gracefully landed in the monsterous shrub.

"Ouch." David said, trying to swing his guitar and sword out of the goop to hit the bush. It was a very viscus (muhahah... big words) liquid, somewhere inbetween yogurt and silly putty. He was contemplating how ironic that a bush was etaing him when all the sudden TEO came blowing through into the shrubbery.

"Hey! The gangs all here!"

[Robyn]

David! *beams at him* You got saved man.

*ahem* You have to stop beating the hedge! It just makes it worse! Look! *points to the purple goo trying to digest David's guitar* See?

Hmm...now to work on how we're gonna get outta this stuff. Aha! *reaches into her random bag of random* I know its in here somewhere! Aris let me have it and its got to be in here. Yes! *pulls out the pointy spike ball of DOOM* Think this'll do the trick?

[Aris]

Aris has been here all day, her feet have been sticking out of bush the hole time.

Let's out a loud yell to let others know she is there

[Robyn]

*turns around while still sitting on David's chest* Hi Aris! What's up?


Now, if the point spike ball of DOOM didn't work, and the spoon of fire didn't work, I guess there's only one thing left!

Aris, do you still have the SPORK OF CHAOS? It may be our only hope.