Post by The Evil Overlordess on Mar 16, 2004 20:19:17 GMT -5
THE HISTORY OF WERR
An Etomological Sage in Two Parts
PART ONE: Werr through the Ages
Throughout time (all right, primarily for the past five months), the world has pondered long over one question. It was not the meaning of life they sought, nor a road that would lead to world to peace, but instead, it was the meaning of the word ‘werr.’<br>
Yes, ‘werr.’<br>
‘Werr’ is a phrase that has been spreading across the States in a way that is almost completely different from the phenomenal popularity of Pokémon, Harry Potter, citrus-scented hand sanitizer and roast chicken flavor Ramen Noodles. In the fall of 2003, Congressman Geoff W. Cooney of Rhode Island commented on this strange word and it’s usage by today’s teens. Unfortunately, all forty-nine reports of the speech differed in content, so the world may never really know what he said about it anyway.
Okay, it really isn’t popular, but it does baffle a lot of people.
The most common misuse of the word ‘werr’ is when one thinks it to be synonymous with the word ‘wurd’, a slang term that can mean ‘all right’, ‘yes’, ‘wow,’ ‘dammit, where did you put the marmots?’ and, on rare occasion, ‘word.’ The meaning of ‘werr’ is, de facto, completely different from this word.
Wurd. Werr. Er, yes.
‘Werr’ was originally a term used by the Late Middle Bronze-Kilted Semi-Transparent Kiplethers, a little-known society located on the far edge of the Roman Empire. Octagus Fabello Sincaid, High Kumquat of the United Kilts in the year 53 B.C, was the first documented person to utter this word. He reportedly scaled the Copper Tower Clethericus at midday and pronounced the word to the gathered crowd before descending to eat his lunch. The response was amazing, and Octagus Fabello continued to climb the Tower every noon in midweek to utter it to the crowds. When asked why he did this, Octagus replied that he felt it was his social duty to do so. Not long after, at the age of fifty-nine, he fell from the tower and was unavailable for further comment.
The popularity of the word grew so much that the day upon which Octagus Fabello uttered it became named for ‘werr’. Originally called ‘Werrsday’, the word has been sadly distorted, due to mistranslation of the Semi-Transparent Records and the decoder’s inability to read the transcriber’s handwriting. As one well-respected historian commented, “whoever wrote this had a mind like a chicken on acid, and about the same attention span. Don’t blame us if it’s a little off.”
At the time, it was not unheard of people having conversations that insisted entirely upon the word ‘werr’. ‘Werr’ became so widespread that it began to creep into other regional dialects and thus became the root for the words ‘war’, ‘word’, and ‘weasel’.
‘Werr’ even became the subject of wars, as one can see transcribed in the Red Book of Southern Middle Gaul, 1207-1234 A.D, recorded by one Hibald Geoff Welph. The ‘War of the Werr’, as it was called, began when one fiefdom leader uttered this word to the other, who was insulted and slew him on the spot.
The war raged for seventeen years, after which the combatants forgot what they fought over and began to wander off of their own accord. There was no ‘official’ end to the War of the Werr, but after a few more months the respective heads of the armies agreed to stop fighting. Strangely enough, upon the afternoon of their deaths, these two generals were engaged in a friendly croquet match. This was several weeks after the end of the war. After several hours one of the generals’ wives thought to look for her husband, as she had not heard the sounds of the match for nearly half an hour. She found both of the former generals in the backyard with notes reading ‘werr’ pinned to their jackets. Both had been whomped to death with croquet mallets and what was suspected to be a salmon. Written on the garden wall in red paint was the word ‘werrhaha.’*
*This is the first documented use of evil laughter, though it has been replaced by the more modern version ‘bwahaha’ by Pantolass the Pretty Good, a former Evil Overlord with a slight lisp.
COMING SOON: PART TWO: Werr in Modern Times
An Etomological Sage in Two Parts
PART ONE: Werr through the Ages
Throughout time (all right, primarily for the past five months), the world has pondered long over one question. It was not the meaning of life they sought, nor a road that would lead to world to peace, but instead, it was the meaning of the word ‘werr.’<br>
Yes, ‘werr.’<br>
‘Werr’ is a phrase that has been spreading across the States in a way that is almost completely different from the phenomenal popularity of Pokémon, Harry Potter, citrus-scented hand sanitizer and roast chicken flavor Ramen Noodles. In the fall of 2003, Congressman Geoff W. Cooney of Rhode Island commented on this strange word and it’s usage by today’s teens. Unfortunately, all forty-nine reports of the speech differed in content, so the world may never really know what he said about it anyway.
Okay, it really isn’t popular, but it does baffle a lot of people.
The most common misuse of the word ‘werr’ is when one thinks it to be synonymous with the word ‘wurd’, a slang term that can mean ‘all right’, ‘yes’, ‘wow,’ ‘dammit, where did you put the marmots?’ and, on rare occasion, ‘word.’ The meaning of ‘werr’ is, de facto, completely different from this word.
Wurd. Werr. Er, yes.
‘Werr’ was originally a term used by the Late Middle Bronze-Kilted Semi-Transparent Kiplethers, a little-known society located on the far edge of the Roman Empire. Octagus Fabello Sincaid, High Kumquat of the United Kilts in the year 53 B.C, was the first documented person to utter this word. He reportedly scaled the Copper Tower Clethericus at midday and pronounced the word to the gathered crowd before descending to eat his lunch. The response was amazing, and Octagus Fabello continued to climb the Tower every noon in midweek to utter it to the crowds. When asked why he did this, Octagus replied that he felt it was his social duty to do so. Not long after, at the age of fifty-nine, he fell from the tower and was unavailable for further comment.
The popularity of the word grew so much that the day upon which Octagus Fabello uttered it became named for ‘werr’. Originally called ‘Werrsday’, the word has been sadly distorted, due to mistranslation of the Semi-Transparent Records and the decoder’s inability to read the transcriber’s handwriting. As one well-respected historian commented, “whoever wrote this had a mind like a chicken on acid, and about the same attention span. Don’t blame us if it’s a little off.”
At the time, it was not unheard of people having conversations that insisted entirely upon the word ‘werr’. ‘Werr’ became so widespread that it began to creep into other regional dialects and thus became the root for the words ‘war’, ‘word’, and ‘weasel’.
‘Werr’ even became the subject of wars, as one can see transcribed in the Red Book of Southern Middle Gaul, 1207-1234 A.D, recorded by one Hibald Geoff Welph. The ‘War of the Werr’, as it was called, began when one fiefdom leader uttered this word to the other, who was insulted and slew him on the spot.
The war raged for seventeen years, after which the combatants forgot what they fought over and began to wander off of their own accord. There was no ‘official’ end to the War of the Werr, but after a few more months the respective heads of the armies agreed to stop fighting. Strangely enough, upon the afternoon of their deaths, these two generals were engaged in a friendly croquet match. This was several weeks after the end of the war. After several hours one of the generals’ wives thought to look for her husband, as she had not heard the sounds of the match for nearly half an hour. She found both of the former generals in the backyard with notes reading ‘werr’ pinned to their jackets. Both had been whomped to death with croquet mallets and what was suspected to be a salmon. Written on the garden wall in red paint was the word ‘werrhaha.’*
*This is the first documented use of evil laughter, though it has been replaced by the more modern version ‘bwahaha’ by Pantolass the Pretty Good, a former Evil Overlord with a slight lisp.
COMING SOON: PART TWO: Werr in Modern Times
Look at the lovely leaf Oz brought me!!